THE 5 STAGES OF "GRIEF" IN KENYA

Opinions are not facts and will never be even when backed up by facts. So please, before you get your panties all up in a bunch, know that I am not here to be argued with neither am I trying to convince you that what I am saying is Bible truth, I am simply voicing my opinion (which I repeat, is not a fact).

If you live in Kenya, I am sure you

have seen all the misfortune that has befallen us in the couple months that have gone by, Westgate Terrorist Attack, JKIA fire, City To City bus accident have been among the worse events. Of course an occurrence like the slapping of the Nairobi Women's Rep by the Nairobi Governor has been one of our worst shows by holders of the public office.

So anyway, from all these, I have realized a pattern in Kenya's 'grieving' cycle, of course being that we are kenyans, we have to defy all logic and swim against the tide, we do not follow any Western model of grief like the The Kübler-Ross model, we forge our own path and stick to it. After all, these western guys are trying to control us and we will not conform to anything that may further promote neo-colonialism. So here goes.

1. Excitement - There is breaking news and all the media houses rush to be the first ones to give it to the common mwananchi sitting in their houses trying to move on with their lives. The breaking news starts, and goes on for as many days as possible on all channels on the television so that you are forced into believing that nothing else in the world is going on and all eyes are on us.
2. Silence - This silence, mainly brought about by worrying. The kind of silence that was there immediately after the results of the 2007 general elections were announced. The type of worrying that dawns on you when you realize that in fact, the hostage situation is not a mere publicity stunt and little children are ruthlessly being shot in cold blood.
3. Unity - Also known as hashtag WeAreOne. I am sure all of you are aware of this one. The point where we know that we can no longer sit and watch while doing nothing. Some corporates decided to start a donations drive and a blood drive. In all our kind heartedness, we squeeze ourselves dry and do the little that we can to help. We even go onto social networks and before we know it, hashtag WeAreOne is trending. We love each other and we refuse to be divided by such events and we stick together till we are told by the media that all is well.
4. Cover Up - Yes, then the cover up begins. We are now united and we want to know what went wrong where. Why would 41 people be killed instantly in a car crush? How did the fire start and why wasn't it put out immediately? Why did our Governor conveniently forget then later apologize for slapping the Women's Rep.? So we wait for these answers, and we wait and wait and wait. You guessed right, no answers.
5. Acceptance - Famously known as Accept and Move on. This is the biggest paradox of them all. Saddest yet funniest thing happens. People stop asking questions, the hashtags reduce  the media stops covering it over the news, somehow, everything else in the world has gained much more importance, some of us pray and hope that nothing else happens in the next few days because we haven't yet recovered. Of course this stage is also characterized by a few video edits, some not so hilarious jokes and XYZ.

Now to my point.

Excitement

Fact - Media makes money from breaking news and viewer ratings, so the more captivating the news, the more the viewers, the more the money.

My opinion - The news can be still captivating without pictures of bloodied dead bodies sprawled all over the floors and on the front pages of our newspapers.

Silence

Fact - Silence could be good, it means people are taking time to reflect, to think and to try to right wrongs.

My Opinion - Silence in times of trouble is possibly the worst of signs. It means that people are not dealing well and they have no clue what to do. It means that people are vulnerable and if not watched carefully, could resort to worse undertakings.

Unity

Fact - Its rather obvious, unity is good.

My opinion - Our unity needs to spread further and beyond our Facebook walls. Our unity needs to be informed and enlightened. Case and point, the additional 0ver 10,000 units of blood that could be discarded because of lack of storage facilities. Seriously, whoever thought that their could be such a thing as over-donation. Someone should have kept count and taken stock.

Cover Up

Fact - In matters of national security, this is paramount.

My opinion - We need to learn the art of cover up. It's not as we see it in movies, in actual sense, it requires skill. You have to literary plug all the verbal holes in the system  Make sure only one person is talking and only one person is telling him what exactly to say. We do not need different spokesmen with different sources of 'confirmed' information in a chest-thumping match feeding us wrong information, making us look and feel like idiots.

Acceptance

Fact - When WFP are requesting for relief assistance. they do not mean Comic Relief!

My Opinion - Accept and Move on is the mentality of losers. We need to fight and continue fighting for what we believe is right even to our graves. As Martin Luther King put it, "In the end, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."

I will conclude by saying this, we have not stopped growing, we grow every day till we die. We were not born like this but this slowly who we are turning into. We have stopped dealing with our problems and are now shelving them away and moving on with our lives